You know how when something exciting is coming up you find ways of trying to make time pass faster? Like instead of saying it’s 42 days till surgery you say it’s 6 weeks. The 6 is a smaller number so it seems like it’s shorter than 42 days even though it’s the same amount of time… well, that’s where I’m at! I alternate between excited, bewildered, unfathomable, and excited again. Sometimes I stop and consider the risks and feel a little nervous but then I consider my life now if I remain the same and the nervousness is gone. Life as I know it is going to change in 6 weeks and I can hardly wait!
Diet wise I’m a bit of a disaster. I said I wouldn’t fall into the, “mourning foods,” mentality but I sure have. I find myself driving thru fast food and eating Little Debbie’s like they are discontinuing ALL their snack foods. I eat M&Ms every day now. I keep buying bottled coffee (bad for multiple reasons!) even though I don’t really like them that much. I am eating and drinking emotionally and THIS is bad… very bad! The emotional eating is what will make the surgery fail. I have noticed it is particularly bad when my joints are swollen and I am in pain. Which is actually a good thing because most of that will go away after the surgery, God willing. However, it also means I don’t have an adequate system in place to deal with emotional eating. This is something I MUST fix.. and soon. I’ll keep you posted..
Love and God’s blessings,